Home Again

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!

I have Trypanophobia

that while better since having to be induced on all my childbirthing experiences, is still a living and breathing monster under my bed in my head. I think it was born around the time that I had Rheumatic Fever and had to have blood drawn once a week, month after month. As a 7-8 year old, my definition of what a needle IS became synonymous with pain and a feeling of knots in my stomach tinged with nausea. As an adult, even rationality shining a light on the pile of junk under the bed doesn’t convince my irrational heart that it’s still a monster – it just LOOKS like a pile of junk to disguise itself in the light! Talking about injections, seeing one on TV, even the THOUGHT of any part of the process makes my hands feel weak and shaky, my tummy feel flip-floppy, and I have to move, pace, whatever!

So the point is that I had another epidural injection this afternoon to try and alleviate the pain in my lower back. They numbed the skin with prilocaine cream, to inject me with lidocaine to numb under my skin, and had one nurse distract me so the other could insert an IV. I’ve had progress, not perfection! And I do not want to talk about what they actually do, or better said, the particulars of an epidural because it involves those Needles. Suffice it to say that I was sufficiently sedated that they could do the procedure without me having an anxiety attack and moving when there was a foreign object in my spine! 🙂

It takes a bit for the steroid to take effect, but the medicine they inject at the same time kills the pain immediately at the site. Of course, the surrounding area hurts, but it’s got to be better than what brought me to the point where I would even consider any type of injection an option!

Glad to be home…feeling groggy and woozy…but grateful for another opportunity to tackle the monster under the bed. Bringing out into the light of day here should help to make it less scary too.

Tomorrow is a new day. See you there!

Peace,

~me

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2 Responses

  1. oh my word, i have something i didn’t know… that needle fear phobia thing actually has a name?!?!?!?!

    always maintain, if you want / have to do anything to my body, do it while i’m OUT. and make sure i don’t see the needle!!!!!

  2. […] I know I’ll get lost in developing them and I’ve got to go get another one of those procedures done – no time right now. (Note: Talk about your delayed gratification! Definitely not in my […]

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