Creepy Fears And A Reckoning

I just had a “family meeting” last night with the kids. A laying down the law, coming-to-Jesus sort of meeting   (a firm, lecturing, no nonsense dressing down, comparable a Fire and Brimstone revival meeting).  After listening to me talk for 15 minutes or so, I asked them,

“Are we clear? Do you understand? Have any questions?”

Son: “So basically the last 14 and 15 years are gone and a new era is beginning?”

Um, Yeah!!

After he left the kitchen and its just me and the littlest talking about some strategies for being more responsible and productive, she glances down, goes white as a sheet and screams,

“OH. MY. GOD!! OHMYGOD! OHMYGOD! OHMYGOD!!”

Instinctively, I calmly and with the “Mom voice” say,

“Look at me and breathe…no, do NOT hyperventilate! LOOK AT ME!! In through the nose…out through the mouth…WHAT is the matter with you?!”

She points down to the floor speechlessly and there is a spider creeping along the baseboard next to the tile in the kitchen. (:O Remember now, this is the same kid who produced this!

In her defense, this was a larger than average spider (maybe a half-dollar sized one? A tad more? I dunno)

Grabbing the newspaper still wrapped in plastic, I walk over to it and “THWUNK!” It is no longer an issue.

“Its just a spider, sweetie – you are 1000 times bigger than it and it was obviously lost.”

Her eyes were bright with a couple of unshed tears and her pupils were dilated until they looked black,

“It was a tarantula, Mom, and WHY WAS IT IN THE KITCHEN??!! WHAT IF THERE ARE MORE? WHAT IF IT HAS FRIENDS??”

“Spiders don’t have social networks – you’re starting to hyperventilate again! breathe!” I said in my most soothing, calm, commanding voice.

“But what if it had BABIES??”

Pointing to the paper on the floor covering the carcass, I reminded her,

“THAT one isn’t going to have babies or do anything fun or social…its little spider spirit has moved on to a better place…”

“OMG! You mean there might be spiders in heaven!?”

“No honey, I don’t think there will be in YOUR heaven…I think your heaven will be whatever you expect it to be … and that would be spiderless,” I reasoned.

“Well,” she said after thinking some more on it, “I want to live where there aren’t any spiders… you know, like Canada.”

Mustering up my serious face, I burst that bubble:

“Canada has spiders too. There isn’t really anywhere on Earth that doesn’t so you may as well make peace with that fact and come up with a plan as to how to deal. Personally, I hate spiders too.”

That got her wheels turning!

“How do you kill them then?! I keep thinking about all the ‘what ifs’…”

“Ok, you need to stop that RIGHT NOW! The ‘what ifs’ will make you crazy and they definitely don’t help. You get lost in the future and that isn’t right now! You need to deal with the reality right in front of you – and right now, right in front of you is a DEAD, non-threatening spider that is going to go away while you look the other way… are you looking the other way? ‘cuz I’m going to dispose of the body now.”

Reckoning. Opportunities. Lessons. Fears. Eternity. Laughter. Love.

And some vicious spider-killing to boot!!

My work here is done.

Namaste,

~me

Honestly, It Is Mostly Scrap

Honest Scrap

Larry, over at Yesterday, Today, and Forever, bestowed a bloggy award on me, which even in NAME works for me!  I don’t usually do the blog award thing, but if I complain about not having inspiration lately (for posts), I really can’t argue when someone hands it to me on a plate, all gift wrapped in an award!

Thank you Larry, for bestowing an award for being encouraging and loquacious! It always goes back to one simple concept captured eloquently in JUST the quote for me:

“See I’m all about them words… over numbers, unencumbered numbered words….Hundreds of pages, pages, pages for words… more words than I’d ever heard and I feel so ALIVE…” ~Jason Mraz

The Honest Scrap Award *awesome play on words*

And just like any bloggy award, there are always the rules:

Rules for the Award:

• Say thank you and give a link to the presenter of the award
• Share “10 Honest Things” about yourself
• Present the award to 10* other bloggers whose blogs you find brilliant in content and/or design or to those who have encouraged you
• Be sure to tell the 10* bloggers chosen that you are giving them the Honest Scrap award and provide the guidelines for them

*Or a number that you can reasonably accomplish in whatever mental/physical state you’re in

10 Honest Things

1. I have an innate weakness for Rice Krispie treats…especially my hubby’s! Can. NOT. walk. away!!
2. I was grounded from my contact lenses when my parents ran out of restrictions for me in high school :0 (a tad bit wild in my youth)
3. Music is just as essential as food, water, and air to breathe for me – if I’m not listening to it, I’m spontaneously erupting into melodic prose of my own (usually nonsense that only my cats,kids, and hubby have to endure!)
4. The skies AWE me and they stop me dead in my tracks – sunsets, sunrises, clouds, storms, stars ~ all the forms and colors and movement
5. I collect quotes and words instead of stamps or coins or more normal collectibles
6. I take pictures to capture moments that I want to share; but selfishly I do it because my memory is so poor that I’m afraid I’ll forget and I want to be able to have memories to look back on
7. In a group setting, I rarely speak up and get physically sick if asked to speak in front of a crowd… (I always took my contacts out in high school when it was time to perform (dance) at pep rallies so that I couldn’t see the faces of the audience)
8. I’ve been a fan of Barry Manilow since I was little and have seen him  live
9. I’ve suffered from depression throughout my life and its BECAUSE of being up close and personal with the Dark Side that I know there is always Hope – most of the “inspiring” and “encouraging” posts I put up here are mostly to help me (it’s all about me! LoL)
10. I can count on my hands the number of times that I couldn’t find SOME humor … even while dancing with the Dark side, I could still see the improbability and silliness in the “seriousness” of the life and times of being human (or is it a human, being?)

The number and names of blogs and people who’ve encouraged and inspired me are too many to list – award giver not withstanding! The caveat in the “RULES” was “reasonably accomplish in whatever mental/physical state”. That being extremely questionable at the moment, I’ll do my best!

1. Southern Sinful Bliss
2. A Year of Art
3. PickMyBrains Art
4. Spittin (Out Words) Like a Llama
5. Mine Enemy Grows Older
6. Quarry House
7. The BridgeMaker
8. The BrianWebber
9. The Wayne Dyer Blog
10. Freshness Factor Five Thousand

Namaste,

~me

Affliction

 

Affliction is but the shadow of God’s wing…

~George MacDonald

Where You’re At

If you’re here for four more years or four more weeks,

you’re here right now.

I think when you’re somewhere, you ought to be there.

It’s not about how long you stay in a place,

it’s about what you do while you’re there,

and when you go,

is that place any better for your having been there?

~Northern Exposure, Soapy Sanderson, 1990

Hand Up

“This guy’s walkin’ down a street when he falls in a hole. The walls are so steep he can’t get out.

A doctor passes by and the guy shouts up, “Hey you! Can you help me out?” The doctor writes a prescription, throws it down in the hole, and moves on.

Then a priest comes along and the guy shouts up, “Father, I’m down in this hole; can you help me out?” The priest writes out a prayer, throws it down in the hole and moves on.

Then a friend walks by. “Hey, Joe, it’s me. Can ya help me out?”

And the friend jumps in the hole.

Our guy says, “Are ya stupid? Now we’re both down here.”

The friend says, “Yeah, but I’ve been down here before and I know the way out.”

- John Spencer, The West Wing